Sex Talk

Even though you may be looking to talk about sex, not everyone on the site may want the same thing. These sites tend to attract people who are only looking to chat. If someone wants to have an intimate encounter in person, this can be a hassle. If you are only looking for chat, be up front about that. If you are turned down, just move on. Don’t harass people or try to push the issue.

Photos

Another common misconception is that everyone on these websites will have explicit photos to share. This isn’t the case. Some people are perfectly fine with posting graphic and detailed photos, while others aren’t. Don’t push people for photos that are naughty. If you are planning on meeting up with someone, asking for a photo is acceptable, but don’t ask for genital shots. If they are open to sending these, they will. Along the same lines, if you are open with taking and sharing more intimate photos, keep them private until you are asked for them.

Describing Yourself

You want to give a good description of yourself without being boring about it. You also don’t want to come across as being stuck up or arrogant in this. You don’t need to list anything that you think is a downfall, but also don’t be too hard on yourself. If you are 5’7”, 180 pounds, with salt and pepper hair, here is a good way to list with without bringing attention to the negatives:

“I’m a tall 5’7” with a lived in body. My hair shows my experience, and sets a striking backdrop for my dark eyes.”

This example was humorous without being harsh.

Listing What You Want

Always avoid lists in a profile. You also need to be realistic, and decide on what’s really important to you. If you are active and want an active woman who is in shape, you can certainly say this. However, if you are the guy described above you need to think about what a tall, slender, size 10 of a woman is looking for. Figure out what is important, and word it appropriately. Here’s an example for someone who wants a woman who is in good shape.

“I’m open to all women, but I am active and need someone who can keep up with me.”

This is gentle, but makes it clear that you want someone in shape.

Site Costs

Most dating sites will charge a fee for full membership. This fee covers maintenance to the site as well as support for all the features. Most sites will offer a free trial membership to give you an idea of how they work and the types of profiles listed. Some also offer free memberships with limited access. In most cases you can expect to pay a higher fee if you choose to pay monthly over longer periods such as quarterly or yearly.

Types of Sites

Once you have a budget you can start looking at the different types of sites available. You can find sites that are general nature, or have a more specific theme. For instance, those looking for partners to play in fetish activity, or those wanting to casually date, may have better luck with an adult dating site. If religion is important to you, consider finding a site that caters to your particular religious affiliation. Since most sites will allow a free period or a limited access membership you can find the best site with a little time. Don’t be afraid to sign up for a few different sites until you find one that best matches your needs. This way you can get a better idea of what to expect and not waste money on a site that won’t help you.

Features

To function at its simplest a dating site only needs to allow you to create a profile, browse, and send messages. However, the better swinging sites will go above and beyond this. You want a site that allows you to browse with specific criteria. For instance, a site that allows you to browse based on location or certain features is going to give you better results. Look for sites that allow you to narrow down your search results. Finding swingers sites that offer live chat and cam chat can also be a great benefit. This allows you to talk to people in real time and see them for who they are and not just have to rely on a profile photo.

Costs

Many swingers’ sites advertise that they are free, but then only give you limited functionality with the free membership. In most cases the free memberships won’t allow you to email other members, and some won’t allow you to even respond to messages you may receive. You’re better off finding sites that offer a free trial period then a reasonable membership fee after the fact. A good swinger’s site will allow you to pay monthly, quarterly, or annually depending on what your needs are.