Sex Talk

Even though you may be looking to talk about sex, not everyone on the site may want the same thing. These sites tend to attract people who are only looking to chat. If someone wants to have an intimate encounter in person, this can be a hassle. If you are only looking for chat, be up front about that. If you are turned down, just move on. Don’t harass people or try to push the issue.

Photos

Another common misconception is that everyone on these websites will have explicit photos to share. This isn’t the case. Some people are perfectly fine with posting graphic and detailed photos, while others aren’t. Don’t push people for photos that are naughty. If you are planning on meeting up with someone, asking for a photo is acceptable, but don’t ask for genital shots. If they are open to sending these, they will. Along the same lines, if you are open with taking and sharing more intimate photos, keep them private until you are asked for them.

Describing Yourself

You want to give a good description of yourself without being boring about it. You also don’t want to come across as being stuck up or arrogant in this. You don’t need to list anything that you think is a downfall, but also don’t be too hard on yourself. If you are 5’7”, 180 pounds, with salt and pepper hair, here is a good way to list with without bringing attention to the negatives:

“I’m a tall 5’7” with a lived in body. My hair shows my experience, and sets a striking backdrop for my dark eyes.”

This example was humorous without being harsh.

Listing What You Want

Always avoid lists in a profile. You also need to be realistic, and decide on what’s really important to you. If you are active and want an active woman who is in shape, you can certainly say this. However, if you are the guy described above you need to think about what a tall, slender, size 10 of a woman is looking for. Figure out what is important, and word it appropriately. Here’s an example for someone who wants a woman who is in good shape.

“I’m open to all women, but I am active and need someone who can keep up with me.”

This is gentle, but makes it clear that you want someone in shape.

Keep It Short

A headline that is long will get looked at much less than one that is short and sweet. Try to keep it under ten words. You don’t want a headline that is just one or two words, as this won’t tell the reader anything. Once you know what you are looking for, you can play around with different headlines until you find one that is around that magic ten word number.

Grammar

Most people are going to be turned off by headlines that are full of grammatical errors. It only takes a minute to make sure everything is spelled correctly and you’ve used proper punctuation.

Avoid Clichés

Headlines that use clichés will be overlooked much more often. Even if you enjoy long walks on the beach, don’t use this as your profile headline. Think of the thousands of other people who have this exact same thing. You want to stand out from the crowd. If the beach is important to you, you can still express this in the headline without using a tired cliché or by sounding cheesy.

Avoid Being Graphic

Even if you are on an adult themed dating site, you want the first interaction to be pleasant. If they have a great photo, don’t be afraid to comment. However, if the photo doesn’t show anything naughty, don’t say anything naughty. Until you know what their likes and desires are, shelve the sex talk.

Be Creative

Women hear the same things over and over again when they are trying to date online. If you tell them something they have already heard a thousand times, you aren’t going to get very far. Instead pull information from their profile about their interests, and use this in a creative way. If they mention they have a love of coffee, don’t tell them you do to. Instead, ask quirky questions like what kind of coffee would they be, or what kind of coffee goes with certain music or movies. This is going to peak their interest much faster than the same boring questions they hear all the time.

Be Available

Many sites will have options to chat with people in real time. If you are trying to flirt, you need to be available. If the woman sees that you are never online, they may think you aren’t a real person and just ignore you entirely.